I absolutely detest my co-worker, Heather. She’s a pessimistic, overly analytical nagging ball of evil. Every day I arrive at work absolutely sure that I could not possibly detest her more. Every day she commits an atrocity that proves me wrong.
Today, of course, was no different.
Heather and I both arrived at work on time. (8:02 is on time, right? Sure!) Around 8:45, Kayla, our boss, assigned me a project. Thankful for anything to do, I began working diligently. At 9:00, Kayla assigns me another project. I set it aside, intent of finishing the moment my first project is done. At 9:15, a new person comes in, and Kayla assigns me the task of training them. Okay, no big deal. Both projects are put off while I train Stu.
“Have you finished calling those people?” Kayla asked me about my second project at 9:30. I told her I hadn’t because I was busy with the first project and with training Stu.
“Okay, Heather, will you call these people and schedule training?”
Heather groaned loudly. I felt deep sympathy for her. It must be terrible for her to have to do some work. To have to call a few people – how ridiculous! Somehow, despite the injustice of it all, I was able to continue training Stu until 10:15.
I immediately resumed working on my first project of the day before I left for lunch at 11. At 10:45, Heather asked me if I was going to make name badges for the new people. Heather knew I was leaving in 15 minutes, that I had been busy for the past two hours with projects, and that it would take longer than 15 minutes to make name badges for all the new hires. She also had done nothing but sit on her plump rump for the past hour, despite being perfectly capable of making name badges herself.
Again, I felt bad for her. After all, I’d been working all morning while she sat and played online, and I was going to eat lunch instead of making name badges for her. I’m a terrible, selfish person, but I was hungry, damnit!
I hurriedly finished my project, turned it in to my boss, and scuttled out the door without a word to Heather.
That poor girl.
